HP - Friends in warm places
by MajorParidae
Summary: After suffering a fatal accident at a carnival, a man finds himself in the afterlife. But he gets a rude awakening to the life of a reborn person. "Okay, yeah I admit. I may have died like an idiot and I may not have been the most selfless guy out there, but give me break. At least let me have more decent try at this new chance!" Will mostly be T rated stuff, but M just in case.
1. Chapter 1 - And tonight's quest isss

**Alright, so the usual warnings and notices for the start of a journey.**

**This is my first fic, like, in any shape or form probably. Unless you count a short backstory of an tabletop RPG character. Anyway, I have little experience with writing and storytelling, so don't expect anything grand. Especially considering this is my first one and I've decided to do this with as relaxed attitude as possible, just to not stress over it too much while getting used to the whole writing part. So yeah, won't be making any promises on regular updates.**

**Fair warning: english is not my first language. And while I have some confidence in speaking it, I have no doubts there will be some mispronunciations, typos and bad grammar that I failed to fix before posting. So sorry in advance for those.**

**Also, remember to review! Constructive criticism is welcome, as long as you are not being an ass about it. As I said, I have little experience with writing, so seeing a problem that can be fixed or improved upon is of great help.**

**Nevertheless, onto the story!**

**-EDITED 16-02-2020: Small errors**

**-EDITED 08-03-2020: Speech/thought explanation**

**" Speaking "_  
" Spells "  
_' thoughts '_  
' telepathy '_**

* * *

**Chapter 1: And our tonight's guest issss….**

It was-, err, actually still is, a warm sunny day in the Surrey county of Queen's England. Sun is shining brightly on almost perfectly clear sky, with only couple clouds drifting along. Carrying along those clouds are the light winds that bring nice cool air to people walking around in the summer heat.

Well, it's not actually that hot, just nice 17⁰C. Quite perfect for a casual summer day for nice warmth to enjoy being outside in loose and thin clothing, but not overly hot for people to faint in.

People were going about their day as any other day of the year. Adults of varying ages running to and from work, old men playing chess in the parks, teens hovering around their usual hangouts, people walking their dogs and so on and so forth. Typical summer activities. One of those typical summer activities is also taking your children out to play, to the beach, an amusement park or the zoo.

Even on that typical summer day, the local zoo was packed with people. Parents taking their kids to see cute and cool animals, teachers guiding their classes on a field trip for research for a report, lovers just out on a date, etc.

"Mom! I wanna go there next! I wanna see cool tigers!", yelled the little boy, running with so much energy you'd think he was on a sugar high.

"*sigh* Alright, alright we will go look at fluffy tigers", the mother responded good naturedly. Kid, you should calm down so the mother doesn't get tired too quickly and cut the trip short. He's just digging his own hole considering how much he likes it here.

"They are NOT fluffy! They are cool and strong and big and-and dangerous!", kid insists. Granted tigers are pretty cool, but they are also quite fluffy. Anyway, kid, you're gonna have to calm down before we have a repeat of the May 23rd's incident. No one want a repeat of the quite literal "shitshow" you caused with the monkeys.

"Oh, if they really are that dangerous, as a good mother I probably shouldn't let you go near them…" she commented wryly. You are so correct, just skip the tigers and end your tour in usual manner so we can all have a pleasant end for the day.

Of course, it couldn't be that easy as the kid just stops, does a 180 turn running straight to his mom, grabs and holds onto her arm with very slight pull. "N-n-no, no, they aren't THAT dangerous and I'm not afraid! So we can just go see them no worries. C'mon mom please please please pleeeeease!". Oh he's trying so hard to salvage the situation from his own comment. What say you ma'am?.

"Hmmmm, well you are sure about not being scared. Okay then, show mommy the way since you are so brave to see the dangerous tigers", comes the mom's sly suggestion.

She's really good at that, it baffles me every time I see and hear her come up with such ways to control her kid. In one swoop she both eased up the child a bit by making them momentarily anxious, thus spending energy. And then making it all good, ending up making the kid feel confident about himself, but also paying more attention to his mom while walking around. Already I can hear the boy replace his previous yelling and running around with excited explanations to his mom while holding her along by hand, the mom following at sedate pace offering comments here and there.

Please just remember to follow your usual route lady!

*clong clong clong*

'_Oh, it seems I have to cease my people watching for now'_. Turning around I see some kids stand by the tank, one of them knocking on the glass pane, wanting to get the snake inside moving.

"Hey! Move you dumb snake! Do something!", the obnoxious kid shouts. You do know it's extremely rude to do that, right? Not only to the animal, but to the zoo also. Should I go over and tell him off?

"Brat, you better stop that before I throw you out of the zoo!". Ooooh, it's Martin the janitor! The kids see him, get scared of his natural charisma (hairy face and angry look) and took off. Yeah, you better keep running! Good thing I didn't have to do anything myself. "Damn kids. Here let me wipe those grease stains for you William", Martin says taking out a cloth and starts wiping the pane of the kid's handprints. You're a great guy Martin, but William is still the wrong name.

"You looking at the ladies again Willie? I swear you have more sense to these things than most of the staff that looks after you. Don't think I don't see you holding a bit too firmly onto Alice", he says in a suggestive tone, wearing his usual perverted grin.

'_Excuse me, but if you were a 3,8 meter long python with no other way of holding onto anything, I bet you would be holding on pretty tight too when being hoisted into air. The fact Alice just so happens to have nice round D-cups and meaty thighs is irrelevant'_. Yes, completely irrelevant. Of course, he hears none of my argument. Shame.

"Well, I have go. Closing time is only few hours away and I have to get started. You just hang in there William", he says, a bit too happy at his lame joke. Though I've gotten used to them by now.

So yeah. I am a snake. More accurately, I am a beautiful reticulated python with just a touch shinier scales, greater intellect and soul of dead man!

What happened to me was unbelievable freak accident of falling from a Ferris wheel and being reborn as a python! Honestly I'm not that sure what exactly happened. One moment I'm in a Ferris wheel with some buddies of mine and the next I'm falling onto the ground…..okay, so we might have possibly been a wee bit drunk. Maybe. Anyway, when I opened up my eyes the next time, I was in a white space completely void of anything except myself.

_**FLASHBACK FLAS**__HBACK FLASHBAck flashback flashback….._

* * *

"Uuuunnggh… shiiiit, my head hurts. Why the hell is it so bright in middle of a night?". Finally managing to pry my eyes open, I take gander of my surroundings. "Where heck am I? What happened to the funfair? Hell, what happened to all the people?", seeing no-one and nothing for miles, I might have started to panic a little. I was shaken out the nightmare scenarios forming in my head, by a scratchy voice behind me.

"Hello and welcome. Please step up to the line and grab a number".

Turning around, suddenly there is kind hall with plastic chairs with metal legs lining both sides of the hall. Right next to me was a ticket machine, you know the kind of "take your number in the line" dispensing ticket machine standing on one leg. At the end of the hall I could see a booth where and old lady was talking.

At first I just kind of stood there, processing what I was seeing and debating is what I was experiencing was real or just another odd trip. After couple pinches and few more stares, I decided to just ride out whatever was happening, hoping to either make sense of the situation or hopefully wake up from the supposed acid trip in my buddy's apartment.

Grabbing a ticket, number 58, I slowly walked to the seats closer to the lady in the booth. After sitting down I started to take stock of the people around me. There was a middle-aged almost bald guy in a suit, teenage girl with glasses and long hair, some generic Japanese dude in his 30-ies, and brown haired little girl holding onto her teddy bear. The old lady in the booth had grey hair tied in a small ponytail, bored expression on her face while she kept on talking into the mic on her headphones.

My sights were drawn to the two doors on both sides of the booth when from one of them came out a guy in dark leather derby shoes, dark blue jeans, navy colored shirt with his sleeves rolled up, and black vest. His hair was short and black, the front slicked back, sideburns and small chin puff. He seemed to be in his early 30-ties, but his blue eyes had very mature look.

"Entry number 54, if you'd please", he spoke in fairly deep voice, but with very gentle tone. At this, the glasses girl got up and walked over to him with a somber face. The man closed the door after himself when she had entered.

…okay I'm starting to get a bit uncomfortable. The only sound in the otherwise quiet hall is the non-stop babbling of the old lady. What is going on? I reeaaally don't want to entertain the idea slowly creeping up on me.

Then the other door opened on a dude with semi-long blond hair came out. He had a loose-fitting red fleece jacket, brown khaki pants and stylish dark brown sneakers. Unlike the other guy, this one had a bright and cheery look in his green eyes. "Could number 55 come with me? Who's 55?".

After a small silence, the little girl lifted her small shaky hand, with only a small whisper of "Um, m-m-me, sir".

Blondie slowly walked over to the girl, crouched onto her eye-level and and talked to her in a gentle tone, "Well hey there. I'm Miguel. What's your name?"

"H-H-Hel-Helga"

"Nice to meet you Helga. It's your turn now. Can you come with me, so we can talk in private? If you want, we can also have some tea while we talk".

"...c-can.. can Teddy have some too?", she asks holding up her stuffed animal.

"Of course he can! We'll have a nice tea party the three of us", the guy replied, all smiles. Truly a nice guy. The girl answered with a small smile of her own, hopped of the seat, took the hand Miguel had offered and they walked into the room.

Now it was silent again. Well, not completely. The lady had not shut up during the whole thing and kept on gossiping with whoever was on other end of the line.

"Ahm, hey, does...does either one of you know what is happening here?"

Our silence was broken by the Japanese guy. He was looking between me and the bald guy, who I was sitting almost next to, with only two seats between of us.

"This is hell."

Chills went up my spine when the bald guy said that. We turned to look at him and I asked "What makes you say that?"

He looks at me and just goes, "I don't know what happened to you guys, but I jumped off a bridge. When I came to, I was here, told to get a number and take seat."

No. Dear God, no.

"So this really is afterlife….it certainly felt like the right answer, but it looks so much like the reception in the company I worked at, that I wasn't sure. Although, having to spend an eternity at that place would be a special kind of Hell", Japanese guy admitted with a small mirthless huff.

"So...I'm actually, really dead?", I asked almost robotically.

They both look to me and bald guy asked, "You're not sure?"

"I, uh….I was a bit drunk before waking up here."

"What's the last thing you remember?"

"...falling of a Ferris wheel."

"Yeah I don't think that leaves it really up to debate", Japanese guy interjected.

I turned to him, little annoyed, "And you're so sure about your death?"

He looked contemplative, "I wasn't really before, but this confirms it. I was working over hours at the company again and only remember looking at my computer screen before passing out. Then I was here." So wait, he died of overworking? Now that I look at him, he does look really skinny and has unhealthy complexion.

It was at this point, that I started to feel really depressed and the guy with blue shirt came out again. "Number 56, please". Wait, what happened to the girl? The bald man sat up and sauntered over, lifting his hand in a lazy wave to us, before disappearing into the room with the guy.

We just kind of sat there, waiting our turn, thoughts no doubt swirling in both of our heads. After what felt like about 20 minutes, blue shirt guy appeared again asking for number 57, the Japanese dude. He looked at me, shrugged and after a wave walked over to the guy.

Now alone with my thoughts, I started to think about whatever was going on in the living world after my death. Were my buddies with my corpse? Was my family mourning? Was my little brother crying?

The red fleece dude came out and called, "Number 58?"

_Flashback over over over over…._

* * *

What I found out, you couple options in afterlife depending on your karma, like absolute sentence to some afterlife, choice of whatever afterlife you're can go into, choice of being reborn, etc.

SPOILERS! Unlike in all those fictions, we don't really get to decide what we come out as, if we choose to be reborn. If you've done well enough and fulfilled some conditions, you get some bonuses or extra leg room, but ultimately what and how your new life is, almost completely depends on Lady Luck. Yeah.

So what ended up happening, was that I got to be reborn as a python. I vaguely remember coming to consciousness in warm darkness, being shaken a lot, like **really** shaking and being weightless for a moment. Struggling to move I broke my free of my egg and breathed in the precious air with great pleasure. I was born in a zoo, in Surrey county, England. After 3 years of growing up, I'm now a perfect specimen of a healthy and big male python.

Gotta be happy that I was born in captivity, since I don't have to struggle in the brutality that is Law of Jungle. Sure I'll never be free, but here in the zoo, I get full service. People look after me, I get to relax all day long without any kind of danger and the food it brought to me. Life couldn't be better for a snake. Especially thanks to retaining my memories. Because of that, I can deal with people easily and the staff thought of me as one of the easiest animals to handle in the zoo. With just that I became the favorite of Reptile House handlers. Also, with bit of fan service by doing 'interesting things' and interacting with customers even behind the glass pane, I also became quite popular in the zoo.

I'm the star attraction of Chessington World of Adventures' Reptile House, the great python, David!

Now, the traffic is slowing down in the zoo, that mother-son pair should be coming through here any moment. Getting to see that beauty every now and then heals me from the stress that I'm being subjected to as the most popular snake of the town.

Finally rising my head and looking around, I see a small girl standing in front of my tank. She is leaning so close the the pane that the glass is getting slightly foggy from her breath. Cute little munchkin. Her bushy hair is especially fan, almost covering her whole head. That curious, inquisitive look on her brown eyes is fascinating, not many girls of her age are that interested in me, unless they are reptile-enthusiasts. Now that I've slithered closer to her, she seems very familiar, like those slightly larger front teeth…

"Hermione! We have to leave soon honey!"

The girl spins her her around fast to call back to her mom, "Really?! is it already the time?". She seems to be in a dilemma. She keeps glancing at me while trying to keep her look on her mother. She really wants to stay, but also doesn't want to oppose her mother.

Her mom seems to come to the same realization and gives an amused smile, "We can stay for a bit longer, but don't go running anywhere else anymore, okay?"

"Okay mom, thank you", she answers back, trying to keep the real amount of happiness from her voice. Her mother isn't fooled for a second. "You really are quite long for a reticulated python. People at the zoo say you are smart. I wonder just how smart."

If my little quest here truly is who I think her to be, then I might have to prepare for chaotic birthday visit in the near future. But for now, I'd like to play around a little and test just how smart a 10 year old Hermione Granger is.

* * *

**And that's a wrap. Phew.**

**Gotta say, I had little different idea of the contents of this chapter concerning the death & rebirth process, but then the ideas about the scene kept coming and I had to cut it short, for now.**

**Like I said, I won't make any promises about updates. For all we know, the next one might not happen for a month, or couple months, or half a year. Who knows.**

**Anyways, hope you enjoyed. Remember to R&R, feedback can help in the writing somewhat.**

**Good day to you all, and stay awesome.**


	2. Chapter 2 - What snakes are good at sums

**Hey! New chapter! Finally (****ﾉ ﾟ▽ﾟ****)****ﾉ**

**I was supposed to work on it earlier, but I, uh, kinda forgot? My bad.**

**Anyway, I changed the speech/thinking explanation a bit. Thought it might get confusing.**

**Now, onto the chapter!**

" **Speaking "**

" _**Spells "**_

' **thoughts '**

' _**telepathy '**_

* * *

**Chapter 2 - What snakes are good at doing sums?**

Today may not have began all that great, but mom and dad really made it all better.

The visit to her cousins' was something that had been dreaded for weeks! Well, mostly by herself, but dad did admit he dislikes aunt Fiona's commanding personality, while uncle Mike was fun to be around. Personally she liked how strong her aunt appeared and made even grown men quiet down with only couple firm words, while uncle was really crude. He meant well, but sometimes his towering form and act made her think of an ogre or a troll.

But the problem wasn't aunt or uncle for her. What had changed the pleasant visits to Surrey into torture, were their kids. Her cousins looked cute as a button at first, but they were so chaotic! She couldn't keep track of how many furnitures were ruined by them or how many times she had walked into their room, only to find a pigsty! She was certain that she hadn't been this messy as a three year old. Having to watch them for even few minutes at a time has her running ragged. Her respect for aunt Fiona has only grown thanks to these experiences.

Thankfully it was now over and she was going home. Dad however decided to end the visit on a high note by visiting the zoo. This was a great chance to see many animals and also refresh her memory for the upcoming exam! The latest chapters in the biology class were mostly about reptiles, so while she did go around most of the zoo, she mostly was in the Reptile House reading the plaques and observing. Some of the animals were kind of creepy and made her keep just enough distance so the plaques could be read, while only giving a cursory glance for the things inside.

She was nearly done, just a big constrictor left, when mom called to tell they would would be leaving soon.

"Really?! is it already the time?". She really didn't want to leave just yet. Just little more time and she was done! After receiving permission to stay for tad bit longer, it was time to focus again on the task.

'Okay, let's see, _"a reticulated python, average length is about 119 inches, weight about 33 lbs"_ '. Looking at the snake, it seems longer and must be heavier. Reading along the plaque, the general knowledge of the species ends and gets to the specifics of this individual. _Named David, born November 2nd, 1988. This specimen is currently considered the biggest for it's age in zoos of England, measuring at about 150 inches at only 3 years old. It is notable that usually the females of many snake species are larger than the males and yet this one is already half the size of a biggest full grown reticulated python_.

"You really are quite long for a reticulated python". Once again looking at the snake, she has to admit that it is impressive and despite finding snakes usually creepy, she very much would like to see this one reach it's full size. Now that she was paying attention on the snake again, she notices it is also very much looking at _her_. Having already noticed it's advance near her, she had put it of as idle curiosity. Now, the snake seemed to be holding an intense staring contest with her.

Suddenly remembering the things she heard Tony telling everyone in class, about how during an event held at the zoo, he and other guests were allowed to get a picture with "the longest snake I have ever seen", as he put it. Of course an assistant was always present holding the snake, but Tony had said the snake was very smart. If you were to believe all what Tony had told, the snake had apparently 'held hands' with him when he approached, meaning the snake had grabbed Tony's hand with its tail-end when being offered an arm ...maybe, just _maybe_, she would ask mom and dad take her to the next event. Surely she could 'hold hands' with a snake for a moment without freaking out.

Wondering about what touching a snake would feel like, she noticed the snake kept on staring at her. Almost like it was examining her, changing it's perspective by moving its head up and down, from side to side slowly. Funny. The first time someone, that is not either a teacher or related to her is, paying so much attention on her and it is a big snake.

"People at the zoo say you are smart. I wonder just how smart".

At this, the snake blinked, its eyes crinkling a tiny bit. Next it's body slid forward, lifting it's head to her eye level. Then it lifted its tail, brought it closer to the glass pane separating them. And knocked.

*dunk, du du dunk dunk…*

...

It took a half-a-minute for Hermione to realize what just happened and what the snake wanted. Fascinated by what was occurring, she gave her answer.

*dunk dunk*

Was the snake trained to do this? Perhaps a trick thought to it by one of the staff members. Or was it a part of some show? Before she could delve deep into her thoughts again, her attention was grabbed by the snake's tail, moving again. This time the snake came closer the glass, breathed out deeply, forming steam on the glass. Isn't the air conditioning inside of the tank supposed to prevent that? The snake breathed out more steam and _started to draw on the glass_.

Now more intrigued than ever before, she paid attention on the forming… calculation? On the glass read 13 + 29 = . Looking at it again, the snake just looked at her expectantly. Was… was he giving her a problem to solve? And such an easy one? She flipped to a blank page on her notebook and drew in extra large size the number 42, showing it then to the snake. He looked at it and formed a circle with his tail, as if an 'ok' sign. He then wiped the problem and started again. This time the problem was a bit harder, 2 x (21 - 3) / (14 - 11) = . She did the calculation quickly in her head and wrote the answer. Once again the snake gave his 'ok' sign and made up another problem. This pattern kept repeating couple more times with progressively harder questions. Taken in by the problem solving Hermione completely forgot to question how did the snake even know math.

Finally, when the snake gave her an equation she had never seen before and didn't know how to even start to unravel, she had to shake her head in shame.

The snake nodded, wiped the problem and drew a smiley face. She had felt no small amount of frustration and confusion in being outdone by a snake, but the drawing lifted her spirits a bit. Next the snake… maybe at this point she should just call him by his name. Next David drew a small 3x3 grid and a circle on the center of left column. Despite her growing confusion and fascination, Hermione had to smile at the development, even if the whole situation was extremely weird. Then again, she had been at the center of weird events for a while now. That bully's face starting to fill with zits or the angry assistant teacher's hair turning bright green were only couple examples of very unusual events she had witnessed, so she figured this could be counted among them.

When her mother finally came to retrieve her, she had had 12 games with David and she had recovered some of her lost pride by taking the lead with her 7th victory. Though she wasn't sure should she be feeling any pride in beating a snake in tic-tac-toe. When mom appeared, David wiped away the game, looking at her pensively.

"Hermione dear, it's time to leave. They are closing the zoo soon. Have you written down everything you need?", her mother inquired.

"Oh, yes, I'm done. I've just been… uhm, studying wi- the snake. It is a reticulated python and quite large for its age", she informed her mom, subtly glancing at said snake. David just lipped the air with his tongue like any ordinary snake. Even if he was far from normal.

"I see. It certainly is a big one. I think I have read about it in the newspaper. Seems if it keeps growing as large as its own popularity, it might be transferred into a another zoo. Hopefully it won't be too far away, the paper made big talk of it possibly growing to be largest of its kind in England and possibly even break some records", her mom commented while eyeing the snake curiously. Hermione certainly hopes so too, David seemed very interesting and she would like to see him again. "But now we have to go, your father is already waiting at the gate".

"Alright", she answered and started to walk beside her mom. She took one last look at the snake before exiting the Reptile House. She wasn't sure, but she could have sworn she saw David wave at her with his tail. Though at this point she wouldn't be too surprised, so she waved back. Hopefully they would visit again before summer ended. She could put up with watching her cousins a little if she got to see the mysterious snake again.

* * *

**David POV**

So that was a thing.

Initially I was actually nervous if she would try to expose me after seeing all I did, but it seems she decided to act casual. Or as casual as a highly intrigued 10-year old could. Perhaps she already has had couple accidental magic things happen around her.

Not that it would raise too much of a fuss. The staff knew I was smart. Not exactly just how smart, but they know I understand some simple words and the _Shave and a Haircut_ knock. I can remember how one of the staff members got excited and wanted to make me do tricks in a show or something, but that quickly ended when I didn't do any of the stuff during practice. I'm certainly not going to end my laid back life by becoming a stage monkey. No offence to our delightful monkey troop Mason, George, Phil and Tina, they're nice. F*ck Rick though, he's an asshole.

I have to say, it was impressive for Hermione to solve the calculations so fast. She even could solve calculations meant for middle schoolers and couple high school ones. Though it was little frustrating to lose to a 10-year old in tic-tac-toe. I'll beat her next time she comes. I'm fairly sure she will ask to come to the zoo again.

The talk about possible transfer to another zoo is interesting. On one hand, getting into a bigger zoo and giant tank sounds luxurious. On the other, it would be noisy, I don't know if they'll force more tedious events with me as a show piece. I like the staff here and their no doubt more lax mannerism. It's not like I myself would get anything from my fame, other than bigger tank and better trained handlers. And I get well fed here without that big of diets planned by them at times. Frankly, I think they could feed me even more. I do feel peckish at times, even with their standard for "full stomach".

The zoo is closing down soon and the guests are power walking out. Then I heard the voice I had been waiting for.

"Mom, c'mon, quickly! They are gonna close and we haven't looked at the snakes yet!", yelled the boy from earlier, dragging dear mommy along.

"Well, if someone didn't get so distracted by the tigers and lions, we wouldn't be in such a hurry. We'll take quick look at the snakes, but then we have to go", reminded the mother. They took a brief look around of all the other reptilians in the house, before making their way over to me. "Hey there, my lovely~. How are you today?", she called for me affectionately.

'Quite well, my dear. Thank you for remembering me, I was afraid you had skipped me completely this time. May I say you look absolutely gorgeous today, as usual'.

This particular lady is one those snake/reptile enthusiasts I mentioned before. Ever since she had first laid her eyes on me during a visit, she had apparently fallen in love with me, declared me the most beautiful thing she has seen and started calling me 'her lovely'. I have to admit, at first I had to question her thought process of adoring a snake so much. But being stuck inside a tank, receiving so much interest and love from various people was endearing and made this existence not seem so bad.

"It's so cool! How big do you think it's gonna grow?", exclaimed the boy with a big grin.

"Hmmm, he is already really big for his age, so hopefully as large as the biggest of his own species. Make sure to eat a lot, so you'll grow into big boy~", she said with a happy smile. She truly was a beauty, especially with that red hair framing her pretty face. "The same goes for you young man".

The boy's face twisted into a disgusted frown. "But I don't like peas, they are gross". Aah, perhaps they had some in their last meal? I don't like them either, but if you just swallow them without tasting them, its okay boy.

"There are a lot of worse options for food, you know. While David here mostly eats rabbits, the smaller snakes eat mice and rats".

Hearing that, the boy's eyes widened a bit, while keeping the frown. He got a pensive look, staring at me. Attempting to encourage him a little, I gathered most of my body and raised my head up above him, slithering all of my body so he could see me in all of my glory. His mom was making a slight squeaky noise while holding her palms together against her grinning lips, with an awed look in her eyes. 'Yes, look upon my glorious form and awe at its magnificent size. Behold my shiny scales and mesmerizing eyes!'.

Yes, I do hold lot of confidence in my appearance. Unlike my more boring relatives, my scales aren't only especially shiny, they also have a ever so slight light-turquoise sheen in right light and angle.

It certainly took a while to get used to this visage. Getting used to having died was difficult in different sense…

* * *

**3 years ago, The realm in between**

After hearing my number being called, I turned my head to look towards the blond man. He was looking at me with a smile and waving for me to come.

I had a good while to think about my situation, even if it felt like a fleeting moment. After a moment of contemplation, I decided to just accept the situation, rose up and walked towards him.

"Good good. Just right on in and we'll get down to business", he said in relaxed and welcoming manner. I walked in, noting that the little girl was nowhere to be seen. Taking a seat in a relatively comfortable chair, I waited for the guy take a seat on the chair opposite of me.

"Would you like some tea? Milk? Sugar?", he asked.

"...um, sure. Just with sugar, no milk". He hmm'd in answer. This was… so normal. Like therapy meeting, or very chill job interview. He poured both of us some tea, added some sugar to both and milk on his own. After handing me my own cup and plate, he started sipping his tea quietly. Looking at my own cup a bit, I took a tentative sip. Hmm, it's good. Earl Grey is pretty safe choice for tea to offer.

"So Eric, how are you doing? Feeling woozy at all? Hitting your head in death usually leaves people with light headache or feeling dizzy", he asked with slight concern.

"So this really is… afterlife? Can't say I'm impressed with how much it looks like an office. Besides, I've only been here for… well a while, and already there are people disappearing", I stated, looking at him for confirmation with slight suspicion.

"You're half right. This is the 'in between' of life and afterlife. This building we are in, is the Reincarnation Enlistment Review Office for Languidly Lived. REROLL for short. And we are here to find out if you are qualified to be reincarnated. Or if we'll send you to another office for further processing", he finished the explanation.

"...that… sounds, um… good?". I mean, how do you answer to something like that?! Another office? Further processing?! Like, if I don't get accepted here, I'll be sent to another office that decides if I got to Heaven or Hell? Or somewhere else completely?

"Excellent. Now, it says here, that you have lived most of your life trying to support your family, not going to high school or vocational school, but straight to work. You have worked many different jobs at different or even at the same time. You never pursued your dream vocation, didn't leave your hometown except for business, didn't follow your girlfriend out of the town and got dumped some months later. Soooo, why is that Eric?". He just read all of that from the folder he has on his lap, then looks at me straight in the eyes, asking that question like he didn't just make my life till now seem like the dullest thing.

So they know everything about us, huh. Guess that's their job here, who knows. I took a sip of my tea, inhaled deeply to calm myself and answered him.

"Yeah, so? Someone had to help mom pay the bills, since we had such shitbag for a father. If I hadn't stepped up to look after Chris and Danny, start part-timing and working right out of middle school, shitbag would've just drank and gambled us out of a house".

...okay I might have raised my voice teensy bit at the end there. Miquel doesn't seem to care. He just looks at me for a while and nods his head.

"Then how come you were in a carnival drinking with other people? Surely someone as responsible as you wouldn't be so careless, as to get drunk and fall from a ferris wheel".

...yeah, granted, not my proudest moment. But still…

"Is it so wrong of me to have a small moment of reprieve? With my life as dull, my social life as boring as you described, is it so wrong for me to relax every once in a while? When my colleagues are inviting me to have wild night in the honour of finally finishing long and hard project, don't I have right to forget my worries for a while and have some fun? Especially when one of those colleagues asking is the super cute and fun one you have hoped to get closer to. No, I think I was perfectly within my rights to let loose for once, get shitfaced and hope for a enjoyable end for the night with a sexy glasses wearing brunette", finished my small rant and stared at Miguel straight into his eyes, daring him to challenge me.

Something akin to, -I don't know, understanding?- passed in his eyes, but was soon gone.

"Indeed. It is imperative that all of us take a moment or two for ourselves. It's only pure insanity to keep living for others all the time, without living for ourselves at all. What meaning does having a soul, mind and feelings have, if we only exist to please others? And what about your thoughts on leaving your family behind, now that you're dead? Any regrets?"

The moment he mentioned family left behind, my thoughts went from frustration to worry that started to gnaw at me. Mom, Chris, Danny.

"...of course I have. I wanted to be there for a long while yet. Both to see my siblings graduate, make sure they get by fine, make sure that mom can also finally relax and to get a chance to live my life without worrying about them. Instead, I ended up causing them even more trouble, more pain and more sadness…", my voice was already straining towards the end, until it just tapered of, dark clouds covering my thoughts.

"And if you were to get another chance to live, what would you do?"

I took a small moment to think about it. Of course I was still worried about my family, but I can't help them anymore, no matter how hard I want to. They will have to figure things out by themselves now. I have faith that Christopher will push on forward, not letting Danny or mom lose faith, and that Danielle will solve it somehow with her level-headedness. Mom is strong enough to look after them still, she got this far thanks to her iron will.

"In the end, all I can do now is to cheer them on from beyond and look after myself. To finally rest in peace or relax in peaceful life. That's all i can hope for". At least that's what I'll have to convince myself about. They will no doubt be plaguing my thoughts for a good while, but I don't think they'll just bring me back or reincarnate me back in time to redo some things.

Miguel kept looking me in the eye, left side of his lips twitching a little bit.

"I see. I guess that's a good answer", he said while writing something on the clipboard. Then he looked back on the files and what he had written for a while, before writing something more.

"Well I guess, congratulations are in order Eric. With this score, you are cleared to reincarnate".

Oh. So there was some kind of scoring system. And this short conversation played some part in it? It couldn't be all, there must be something else. We haven't been talking for even 20 minutes.

"Um, really? Was that it?"

"What? Were you expecting something more? Something grandiose?", Miguel just looked amused. I wonder how many people were as confused as me.

"A little maybe. But, okay. Aaa, so what now?"

"Now, you'll take this ticket here", he handed me small slip that was very smooth and had a slight golden sheen to it, "and you go through that door over there, talk to the lady waiting there and follow instructions".

I looked over to where he was pointing. I'm fairly sure there was no door there when I entered. When I turn back, I notice something familiar behind Miguel and his chair, on a shelf. Among a throng of books, various items and knick knacks, is a teddy bear. The little girl's teddy bear. The little girl who is nowhere to be found.

I guess Miguel noticed where I was looking, as he said with a somber smile, "Ah, and keep in mind that any items you bought with you, can't be taken into your new life, whatever kind of life it may be".

Damn, now I feel depressed. But I guess also happy that the kid got to live a new life. No one that young deserves to die.

Feeling into my pockets absently, I find my wallet. Nothing really precious in there, except for the folded picture of me and my family. Looking at it, I just had to ask, "Not even this?"

Miguel just shakes his head. "You can hold onto it till your departure, but it will disappear completely at that moment".

Aah. So that's why. I looked at the bear again and then at the picture. I don't feel like parting with it and it wouldn't hold any meaning to leave it here. I will take it along to my final- err, well maybe not final journey. Who knows what I get to do in the new life that awaits. Shoving the picture and wallet into different pockets, I sit up and make my way to the door.

"Take care now, Eric. And good luck to whatever life that awaits you. Make sure to enjoy it this time", Miguel waves to me, as he gets up, reading himself to another "customer" I guess.

"Yeah, thank you. You just, uh, keep doing what you're doing". A bit awkward, but I don't really know what else to say.

I open the door, go through and what hell is this?

"Welcome, welcome dear customer! Are you ready to spin the Wheel of Fortunate Life?!"

* * *

**Adder snakes!**

**That's one fateful meeting done and over.**

**We also got more exposition on Eric's origin story. Or at least to a small part of it~**

**I made so many corrections on this chapter, 'cause I was testing different format for the text if it would read better. But ended up keeping it the same.**

**Again, don't hold your breath about the next chapter, might take a while. Or it might not. Who knows. I sure don't.**

**Thank you for reading! And remember to R&R!**


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